After 30 years in human resources and recruiting — including running recruiting for a large broadcast group and now spending the last 7 years owning my own media recruiting firm, Carver Talent — I’ve come to one undeniable conclusion:
Recruiting is less of a profession and more of a front-row seat to the greatest reality show ever created. Maybe I should consider hiring Spencer Pratt.
Just when you think you’ve heard it all… somebody schedules an interview from a fishing boat. Or is bitten by a cat. Wears a dirty t-shirt for a Zoom interview. Brings their mom to the interview. Yes, these all really happened. Or pauses a career move because the Strait of Hormuz, oil futures, inflation, and Mercury in retrograde apparently all teamed up against this offer. In recruiting, time kills all deals. Honestly, that’s true in life too. The longer people sit in fear, uncertainty, or ego, the faster momentum dies.
And honestly? I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Recruiting teaches you more about life, business, coffee, psychology, negotiation, ego, resilience, and human behavior than most MBA programs ever could. It’s part sales. Part therapy. Part hostage negotiation. Part stand-up comedy.
So after three decades in the trenches, here are a few life lessons recruiting has taught me.
1. Everybody Wants Change… Until Change Actually Shows Up
Candidates say they want growth.
Clients say they want innovation.
Companies say they want transformation.
Then the offer comes, the move becomes real, and suddenly everyone starts acting like you asked them to relocate to Antarctica and live without Wi-Fi.
Human beings love the idea of change.
Very few actually want the discomfort that comes with it.
Recruiting teaches you quickly:
People don’t fear failure nearly as much as they fear uncertainty.
And uncertainty creates hesitation. Hesitation creates delay. Delay kills momentum. Time kills all deals.
2. The Best Candidates Rarely Need You
But They’re Glad You Called
The strongest talent usually isn’t sitting online refreshing job boards while crying into a bowl of cereal.
They’re working. Winning. Producing. Busy.
Which means recruiting at a high level isn’t about “finding unemployed people.”
It’s about building trust with successful people who weren’t even looking. Yes, read that again.
That’s where relationships matter. And, access.
Not databases.
Not AI buzzwords.
Not LinkedIn selfies with inspirational quotes over sunsets.
Relationships.
The media business is smaller than people think. Your reputation follows you forever. Burn bridges carefully.
3. Counteroffers Are Like Getting Back Together With Your Ex
Sure. Sometimes it works.
Most of the time?
You’re just delaying the inevitable disaster.
Nothing says “we value you” quite like:
“We suddenly found an extra $10,000 after you resigned.”
Amazing how budgets magically appear once someone walks out the door.
Recruiting teaches you this:
If someone only appreciates you when you’re leaving, pay attention.
That applies to jobs, friendships, clients, and relationships.
4. Everybody Says They Want Honest Feedback
Until You Give Honest Feedback
Candidate:
“Please tell me why I didn’t get the job. I can take it.”
Recruiter:
“They felt your communication style came across a little aggressive.”
Candidate:
“THAT’S INSANE. THESE PEOPLE ARE IDIOTS.”
Ah yes. The healing journey begins.
The truth is, feedback is one of the greatest gifts in business and life — if your ego doesn’t strangle it first.
The people who grow the fastest are usually the ones willing to hear uncomfortable things without immediately launching into a 12-minute defense speech.
5. Your Career Is a Business
Start Acting Like It
One of the biggest mistakes professionals make is believing loyalty alone protects them.
It doesn’t. Trust me…I learned this the hard way.
Acquisitions. Companies restructure. Leadership changes. Budgets get cut. Entire industries shift overnight.
You are the CEO of You, Inc.
That means:
- Network before you need help
- Protect your reputation
- Keep evolving
- Return calls
- Don’t be difficult for sport
- And maybe… don’t torch people publicly on LinkedIn while posting about “professionalism”
Just a thought.
6. The Interview Starts Before the Interview
You’d be shocked what hiring managers notice.
How you treat the receptionist. Because my receptionist was ALWAYS my first interviewer.
How fast you respond.
How you write emails.
Whether you complain nonstop.
Whether you act entitled.
Oh, and your social media presence.
I once had a candidate absolutely crush an interview… only to lose the opportunity because he spent 10 minutes yelling at someone on the phone in the lobby in front of the receptionist before meeting the GM. Cya…
People hire energy.
Not just resumes.
Nobody wants to spend 60 hours a week trapped in meetings with a human rain cloud.
7. Recruiting Will Humble You Fast
You can have the perfect candidate.
Perfect client.
Perfect timing.
Perfect offer.
And still lose the deal because:
- A spouse said no
- Somebody got cold feet
- A company froze hiring
- A dog got sick
- Somebody wanted to “wait until after vacation”
- Or somebody’s uncle suddenly offered them a job at a boat dealership in Sarasota
Again: time kills all deals.
Momentum matters in recruiting. The longer decisions drag out, the more opportunities disappear, emotions creep in, and chaos enters the picture.
This business teaches resilience.
You stop taking every loss personally.
You celebrate wins quickly because another fire is already starting somewhere else.
You don’t get too high on the highs or too low on the lows. You work. Hustle. Hard.
And oddly enough, that’s a pretty solid life lesson too.
8. Humor Is a Survival Skill
If you can’t laugh in recruiting, you won’t survive recruiting.
You have to laugh when:
- Someone misses an interview because they “fell asleep”
- A candidate asks for $300K with two years of experience
- A client wants a unicorn candidate by Friday… for a budget from 2009
- Someone says “I’m definitely resigning” and reverses course 14 minutes later
You either laugh… or start day drinking before noon.
And HR generally frowns upon that.
9. The “Perfect Candidate” Doesn’t Exist… But the Delusional Ones Are Everywhere
One of the biggest myths in recruiting is that somewhere out there is a flawless candidate just waiting to be discovered.
Wrong.
There are great candidates. There are good candidates. There are “this could work with some development” candidates.
And then there are candidates who believe they are a once-in-a-generation hybrid of Elon Musk, Oprah, and a Navy SEAL… but with none of the resume evidence to support it.
I’ve learned this the hard way:
The more someone describes themselves as a “rockstar, unicorn, game-changer, disruptor,” the higher the probability they’ve disrupted exactly one thing in their career… and that was their last performance review.
Recruiting teaches you that humility closes deals faster than hype ever will.
The real top performers rarely need to announce it.
They’re too busy actually performing.
And ironically, the moment someone tells you they “don’t really interview, companies usually just find them,” you already know you’re about to invest 45 minutes you’ll never get back.
At the end of the day, recruiting isn’t about finding perfection.
It’s about finding real people who can actually do the job… without requiring a theme song and a personal branding workshop to get through a Monday.
10. Eating What You Kill Changes Your Perspective Real Fast
There’s also this little thing called owning your own recruiting firm.
Which means I eat what I kill.
Can you imagine?
I only remain fed, housed, insured, caffeinated, and marginally sane because I successfully close deals involving actual human beings.
And humans do funny things.
They panic.
They overthink.
They disappear.
They change their minds.
They accept counteroffers from companies they swore they hated 48 hours earlier.
They suddenly decide “timing isn’t right” after six rounds of interviews and an offer package that looks like a Powerball payout.
Case in point: I recently had a candidate complete a client’s interview process. They moved quickly and made an immediate offer. A 50% base compensation raise for this candidate. He ghosted me for a week, said he was an “8.5” on a 1-10 scale of interest when we finally did connect (a yes in my book), but then said he needed to speak to his mom for advice. After 3 more days of ghosting and waiting until literally the last minute of the client’s deadline to answer, he declined. “The timing just wasn’t right.” I won’t disclose the size of the commission check I lost, but it was substantial. Poof. Gone. You win some, you lose some. Yes, those pesky Chief Engineer candidates are interesting sometimes…
In the words of Shark Tank’s Mr. Wonderful, this candidate is now dead to me.
When you own the business, recruiting becomes very real very fast.
There’s no guaranteed paycheck showing up every two weeks because you “had a lot of meetings.”
No participation trophies.
No gold stars for effort.
No corporate safety net.
You close deals… or you don’t eat.
And honestly? That pressure teaches you a lot about life.
It teaches urgency.
It teaches resilience.
It teaches humility.
It teaches relationship-building.
And it definitely teaches emotional control when somebody blows up a placement after weeks of work because their astrologer told them not to make major life decisions during a waxing moon. Or, their mommy said no, evidently.
The reality is this:
Recruiting is one of the few professions where you can do everything right and still lose.
That’ll either harden you… or sharpen you.
Preferably both.
Final Thought
After 30 years, here’s what I know for sure:
People are complicated.
Business is emotional.
Egos are fragile.
Trust matters.
Relationships matter more.
And no matter how much technology changes recruiting, human nature never really does.
But despite the chaos, the missed flights, the counteroffers, the ghosting, the impossible searches, and the occasional complete insanity…
There’s still nothing better than helping change someone’s life with the right opportunity.
That part never gets old.
And just when I think I’ve finally seen everything in recruiting…
Tuesday, after a long holiday weekend, happens.
Ty Carver has over 30+ years of recruiting, HR management, sales, and leadership experience…including the last 15 specific to the broadcast media industry. He is the Founder/CEO of Carver Talent, a local broadcast media management recruiting firm. As the former Head of Recruiting for Raycom Media, he has deep industry relationships. Have a media corporate executive/management or television station management recruiting need? Contact ty@carvertalent.com for more information.